Spider-Man: Workers Comp

Spider-Man: Workers Comp

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Woah Woah! I’m gonna fall! And all because of my unsafe working conditions… and short break times, how ever will I pay my medical bills! Woah!
*Pew* Huh! Woo! Hey, you alright? Woah, Spiderman! Looked like you where about to take a nasty fall there. Almost kind of on purpose. Maybe don’t stand so close to the edge alright? Definitely. Yeah. I’ll do- I won- no. Oop! Don’t wanna forget this. Otherwise falling to your death might hurt a little bit. Maybe I should get one for these for myself, might come in handy, huh? *Grunting* What? Wait what!? ♫Epic Notes♫
What is happening right now? Grrrr. I thought you left! Yeah, I thought so too, this normally works the first time, let’s try again. Nooooooo! I want workers comp! What!? If I get hurt on the job, they’ll pay me. They’ll do that if you don’t jump off the building. Yeah, but not as much. This will kill you. We’re twenty stories up. On a scale from a sprained ankle to a pancake, you will make one convincing breakfast. I could make this, come on. Based on what, experience? Get back up here, come on. Nooooooooo…. What is wrong with you? I don’t like working here, it’s hot, and I’m afraid of heights. Then just- Get another job. I’m not good at interviews. Okay, look I- there are sirens, and things happening, I have to go. Just stay on the roof, okay? Please. If you need to take an elevator, that’s fine, maybe the stairs? Get a work out. Whatever you have to do. Just, okay? Yeah alright. I know you’re disappointed, I am sorry. I mean you really shouldn’t be, but you know, maybe just sit down and take a break, cool off a bit, I’ll check in later. Oh you have gotta be kidding me! ♫Epic Music♫
Really Man! ♫Epic Music♫ *muffled by concrete*
Oh yeah! Workers comp! You know there are millions of people in this city who are potentially in danger at any given moment, right? Danger they probably don’t wanna be in. Yeah, you should go, don’t- don’t stick around on my account. You have to promise to stop trying to hurt yourself. Now that you mention it, I don’t really feel like I’ve experienced bodily harm due to negligence. I should probably jump again. It doesn’t have to be so dramatic. Okay? Nobody can pay you if you’re dead, just fake a limp or something. I guess that might work. Just stay off the roof, and see a psychiatrist like as soon as possible. *Spidey Senses* This is way better.
*Web Pew* *Car Horn*
Woah! You are certifiably insane. All I want is a workplace injury and it’s not happening. Really? That’s it? And then you’ll stop? Yes! *Pow!* Happy? Yup. ♫News Tune♫ Of course. Tadda. ♫Living Forever♫

100 comments

  1. I take offence to the wasting time article, it is far too accurate and I read it at the same time it was written.

  2. I like the love for detail you put into this. It's right there for less than 3 seconds, but it was one of the funniest things in this video ๐Ÿ™‚

  3. This is definitely one of my top favorites from you. Like, seriously, the acting was top-notch, the humor was on point and I absolutely loved the Spider-Man.

    "On a scale of sprained ankle to pancake, you will make one convincing breakfast."

    As someone said, that is Marvel level writing right there.

  4. I just had a Spiderman Homecoming advertisement before this video. I knew as soon as I skipped the ad which video would be more entertaining.

  5. "On a scale from a sprained ankle to a pancake you will make one convincing breakfast." I hope to all the gods that you are involved in the next Deadpool, but I will also accept the next Spiderman.

  6. Do you guys ever make a bad video? C'mon my laughing muscles can only handle so much! Seriously though the writing and performance you guys can pull of on a low budget is better than a lot of "high quality" tv shows in my country (The Netherlands).

  7. I love that Kyle already knew someone was going to pause the video to read the newspaper article and made a rant on one

  8. 2:34 bottom left corner their is a funny article about you reading the newspaper's article that you are reading! Both confusing, wall breaking and HILARIOUS!

  9. "Don't wanna forget this. Otherwise falling to your death might hurt a little bit."
    "On a scale from a sprained ankle to a pancake, you will make one convincing breakfast."
    These are such a Spider-Man lines.
    "Masked Menace Assaults Worker"
    And that would be J.J. at work.

  10. That was glorious!
    A sensational Spider-Man performance! That breakfast line was sheer brilliance; the most Spider-Man line I've ever heard in a fan video.

  11. It's like in the incredible where he got sued for saving the life of someone commuting suicide. But here he gets bad press for punching a guy who wanted an injury. When people try to hurt themslef the superhero always gets blamed.

  12. 2:19 Why is the Spider-Sense tingling when the suicidal construction worker is in danger? Spider-Man may consciously be a selfless hero, but his Spider-Sense is a subconscious mechanism that doesn't work that way.

    If you have a Spider-Sense, it only tingles when you yourself are in imminent danger, and only if the source of said danger does not also have a Spider-Sense. Therefore, Spider-Symbiotes like Venom and Carnage are able to catch Spider-Man completely off guard. The same applies to other Spider-People who got their powers in a similar way that Peter Parker did.

  13. I love Kyleโ€™s personality. His delivery of every line makes it that much more funny. And itโ€™s so unique that I can tell itโ€™s him even through the suit

  14. On the scale from a sprained ankle to a pancake you will make one convincing breakfast. Somehow Both idiotic and awesome

  15. Did you have Kyle write the newspaper text? The bottom left article is… surprisingly accurate, mildly insulting, yet somehow very entertaining. If it wasn't Kyle I don't know who it could be.

  16. Great. Now that I've watched this my reccomended section has gone to shit. "Learn Animals Learn Colors with Spiderman 3D w Trucks!" There's more. " BABY SPIDERMAN Stop Motion Video with Pikachu & Venom". And there's still alot more.

    I couldn't ask for more! I'm so happy!

  17. Mind you, Spiderman would punch someone's head off. As the PS2 game would say: "You know why Spidey doesn't just punch everyone into a red paste? He pulls his punches."

  18. "On a scale from a sprained ankle to a pancake you will make one convincing breakfast"

    DEAD

    Give my life insurance to my dog

  19. Lol good one with the newspaper you got me someomes wasting his time now by readi,g this newspaper in a sketch lol i am one of many i bet ๐Ÿ˜† ๐Ÿ˜† ๐Ÿ˜† ๐Ÿ˜†

  20. 1:07 "I hate working here and I'm afraid of heights"
    Spidey-"then just…..(wait then why in the blue blazes is he jumping from a…)

  21. Oh shit I just realized what that "rooftop" is. They're at a parking lot bear a beach or smth where the lot is loosely "enclosed" by those concrete things

  22. Whoever is the writer for y'all's videos is a gosh darn genius! "On a scale from sprained ankle to a pancake, you will make one convincing breakfast." lol

  23. The acting was so bad that it made the video ecen better ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ.
    Keep it coming ๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ‘

  24. Damn, who knew kyle made a great spiderman?
    This skit would fit in perfectly
    And that ending is so accurate in so many ways

    …Actually…the camera angle and lighting reminds me of the intro clip for the spiderman movie-game

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