Love is the Key to Unity

Love is the Key to Unity

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Hi everybody, my name is In Jin Moon and welcome to i-Home Church. I first want to start off with this week’s sermon by thanking
many of you who have written in and really expressed your heart beautifully
after our last sermon “H.E.A.L” and I really want to thank you for your
honesty and moving testimonies and your moving stories about what you have been
through and how much you believe in really kind of moving forward and wanting to be that true love person, a man
and a woman of God and I was really moved to tears by some of your emails and some of
your responses so once again, thank you. This week, I want to talk about the topic
of love is the key to unity and I’m sure a lot of you might think well, that’s kind of
obvious isn’t it? Well, some of the most important or
profound insights in life come in very simple sound bites or a simple wisdom nugget as I call it but as we all know for those of us who have quite an
experience being a veteran on this journey through life, really try to be a true love individual know that trying to apply those principles in our daily life or in
our reality is not that simple. And so I can totally understand many of you
when you ask the questions you know I’ve been a believer, I’ve been a proud
unificationists for many many years of my life, but lately, I am dealing with
some of these things that are really challenging my faith and many of you have
expressed to me about your discontentment or your unhappiness regarding your own life vis a vis your kids or your parents or your intimate
relationship in the context of a family but many of you have expressed difficulties in the community that we
call the church and the words that I hear over and over again in many of your testimonies and
many of the emails is the word unhappy and I feel no piece and there’s just so much
conflict, how do we move forward? Well True Father shared with us his wisdom nuggets a while back and he said, “no one wants to unite if the purpose of doing so is
temporary. Everyone wants eternal oneness. What single element can bring that about? It is LOVE!
Love is the foundation for unity. It is the foundation of happiness that is worth ending dedication. Without
love there is no happiness. Without love there is no peace. Without love there is only conflict. But when love is abundant everything is harmonized.” When you listen to this quote, it’s quite
quite eye-opening isn’t it because Father is clearly saying that when you do not
have love in your life, that’s when there’s no happiness, that’s when there’s no peace and your life for our
life is rife with conflict. And so we know that from experience many times we tried
to kind of live our lives hoping to have peace or happiness in our life but what
Father is basically saying is without an understanding of what love
is and without trying to experience it or apply it in our daily lives we will
never get to the goals that we seek which is many times we want happiness, we want peace in
our families, we want families without conflict and we also know from
experience that in a religious institution, there’s many times a pack mentality or a
mob mentality and wherever the mob in that particular community goes, everyone
follows and sometimes we’re very very good at just following and not really thinking about
where we are or who we are in the process and so we’re very good at kind
of fabricating the sense of unity but if it is not real or if it’s not genuine or if it’s not
true, that fabricated sense of unity will only be temporary and before we know it,
we’re going to be challenged with life because guess what,? Life has a way of
interjecting itself into every aspect of our lives and if we are not true to who
we claim we are supposed to be which is a true love movement and you know and
we’re not really working on being a true loving person each day and each night,
then sooner or later the big tsunami of life will come in hit us at lo and
behold, we will be left floundering out in the open sea wondering where all
our happiness where all our sense of peace went and you know being inundated with
all of these conflicts or difficulties in our live. We feel swamped. We feel
totally zapped out of our energies and we’re wondering whether we can go on
another day and I think if we ought to ask ourselves the question of how are we
doing as that true love individual or how are we doing as a movement, well, I think we have to
agree that part of the reason why we are having such difficulty at really
resolving all the conflict or really finding that inner peace that we so desire is that many times we have forgotten how to love in the process of trying to create or many times manufacture or fabricate the sense of unity. And so, when we asked
ourselves, well then ok, we’re dealing with family or a community that’s less
than ideal so then we need to ask ourselves well, how can we experience or
apply this thing called true love in our lives so that we can help ourselves work
towards this unity or this unification church or a unified family that we are
really kind of proclaiming ourselves to be out into the world? There’s this
wonderful story that Father shared with us many years ago on May 1, 1977 and
he gave his own testimony about working with this young prostitute to rehabilitate her and
restore her to God’s daughter that he really knew her to be and he said “I once
rescued a prostitute, a young girl who had fallen into that pitiful situation.
I loved her as my own sister, I remember it as if it were yesterday. After listening to her story, I wept with her and truly uplifted her. That kind of deed is greater and more
precious than prayer.” When I read this testimony of Father, it really moved me to tears because
in this tiny little story about his little interaction of how he was able to
transform or take this young prostitute from her predicament to an understanding
that she was God’s daughter, Father did couple things or what I like to call the
three steps and one of the things I that Father did it really kind of
showing or expressing or applying true love in this girl’s life vis a vis the girl’s relationship to True Father is absolutely profound because he starts off the relationship not in a way
having her come to him but he is the one who seeks out. She is the reject.
She is the unwanted. She is the other vis a vis the society and many people going on with
their life being very very happy not dealing with the rejected or the wasted
or the ones that are left behind but Father having the heart of really the True
Father of the world or True Father of the universe sees every person in that true divine state. He has a picture of
this beautiful young girl and even though she is in this wretched state living a life as a
prostitute, Father never give up on every individual’s potential to become that
divine and a beautiful child of God. So father is the one who is proactive. Father is the
one who reaches out to this one labeled the other, or the ugly, or the untouchables of society and what does he do? There are these three incredible steps
that really are the key to transforming any relationship. Father says he loves her like his own sister. Again, this idea of really living for the sake
of others and understanding the other as a member of your own family is a beautiful beautiful
witness to who God is as our heavenly parent. But what does father do? Number one, he listens to the
prostitute. Number two, what does he do? They weep together. Father weeps together with the prostitute. And
what is the next thing that father does? Father uplifts the prostitute. So, it really doesn’t matter who we are. We can be born rich.
We can be born poor. We can be a prostitute. We can be a nun or a saint.
Regardless of what kind of categories or designations or terms that the world has
for us, we as human beings, as that child of God, we all want to be understood. We all want
to be acknowledged. We all want to be appreciated as that divine and a
beautiful child of God. Well by Father applying and really
expressing his love in these three steps does exactly that. By listening to the prostitute without
any judgment just purely really giving of himself, just being there to listen to her story, he
helps her feel understood. And isn’t that one of the most incredible things about being loved? When you feel loved by
somebody, you feel understood by them and that’s the first step that True Father takes.
Then what is the second step that True Father does? He weeps together with her. Not only does he listen to the
story of this prostitute, but he becomes this compassionate, almost like a mentor,
almost maybe a father figure that this prostitute never had and he weeps
together acknowledging what she has been through, what acknowledging her suffering thus far and
really being compassionate enough and really being empathetic enough to in a
way weep together in listening to the difficulties or to the horrendousness of her situation and in that action acknowledges her. Acknowledges her as somebody who has suffered. Then what is the third step that our True Father does? He not only listens and not only weeps together. He not only understands makes
her feel understood and not only acknowledges her suffering, but the third step that Father does is uplift her. In a way, Father is showing her that he appreciates her as that incredible divine daughter of God that she can be and by
reminding what she was meant to be or the manifestation of what she can be in her life, the kind of a vision that God had for
her when he created her, that vision and that understanding by truly appreciating
her as this beautiful person uplifts her and really transforms her into the kind of a person
that God, that our True Father and ultimately she wants to be. And so it’s an incredible, absolutely beautiful story and you know in our life many times you know we go to a doctor because we want
a cure for some of our ailments that we’re dealing with and what those are good doctor do? A good
doctor listens because by listening to what you have to say about what you are suffering
from, he will get an assessment of what kind of symptoms you are dealing with.
And what does a good doctor do? A good doctor is going to acknowledge those symptoms that you
are experiencing and you know give you a diagnosis of your situation or a diagnosis of your healt and then what else does a good doctor do? He acknowledges your symptoms, he understands what you’re going through and
therefore, he is going to help you appreciate or uplift you in your life
by giving you a better remedy for your situation but many times prescribing a
particular medication to help improve your situation and you know religionis kind of like that in
that Father says you know part of the reason why I have stressed home church
over the years is because Father doesn’t want brothers and sisters or men and
women all around the world to be addicted to religion. Religion is what
you need when you are sick and you need a doctor to kind of help you through it,
but the whole point about being a good religion or a good doctor is to
restore your health. We need religion because we fell away
from God and now we need a certain kind of a teaching or perhaps an
institution that helps guide us to live a better and an improved life. But the ultimate
responsibility of really bringing it home is in our care, or what we call 5 percent
responsibility. So many times, we go through life demanding from our loved ones to be
loved and to be understood and to be acknowledged and to be appreciated not
realizing that in order to you know hope this from another person, we have
to do the very same starting with ourselves. We have to understand who we are, who, what, where, and
when, the four questions that I like to talk about. We have to understand who we
are. We have to acknowledge that we are God’s sons and daughters and we have to
truly appreciate our life living a life of gratitude and that’s really the only way
we are going to venture forward and be that light onto the world by helping
others to see that they are that incredible men and women of God. So some
of you, when you kind of hear this story of True Father might think well ok, if I
have difficulty in my relationship with my parents or with my children or with my spouse or
with my extended loved ones, all I have to do is just listen and cry together
with them and say couple nice words of praise and our relationship should be solved, but that is not what Father is talking about. First of all, this person knows that
their relationship that starts at the moment Father reaches out to her is
not something temporary. What they both long for and what they’re going for is
really creating this internal oneness this heart of a family. And so the
prostitute knows that Father will be there for the long haul. Father’s not just you
know just weeping or many times in a church community there’s almost like this
pressure to cry and one of the things that really turned me off as a believer in
this community when I was growing up is all of this horrendous loud unison crying
and there was almost like this a peer pressure that you had to cry in order to
be a faithful person, like you couldn’t possibly be a loving person if you
didn’t know how to yell like a coyote you know looking at the moon in
the night sky and I totally understand the need for that in some situations and
I understand the heart but I also could see that there was just incredible
pressure for people to kind of act out their faith and that’s not what Father is
talking about here. Father is talking about really kind of being
able to empathize with the other to really fully understand their situation
and in this particular instance maybe it was crying together, but maybe in a
different context it would be something totally different, but what Father achieved in
this little interaction with a prostitute is he made her feel like she
was somebody incredibly important and I think many times in you know in the
course of our life we’re so busy with mission work. We’re so busy with all the little details of life that
we truly take our loved ones for granted and many times we are very good at
listening to people who come and visit our home for the day. We give them our
undivided attention. We give them our undivided appreciation. We give them the undivided acknowledgement in how we are so happy to have them in our lives but many times in an immediate relationship or especially in a married relationship, we take each other
for granted and we forget to learn how to listen to the other. I know that in many marriage
therapies, one of the first things that the therapist would usually ask a couple
to do is please express your heart in three points and see if the other can
repeat exactly what you’ve said to kind of show you that you have been heard and it
is absolutely astounding to me how many couples cannot do this simple procedure of repeating what the other have said. They
kind of generalize, the three points become one sentence and like for
instance if a spouse says you know I would really like for us to communicate more, touch more,
and to show our appreciation, communicate touch and show our appreciation. Many
times in this therapy session, the other cannot repeat those three things. And so
you realize that we stop listening for some reason the minute
we get married and we think that we have this person as our lap down partner for the rest of
our life you know they can’t go anywhere because we’re blessed, then we just start
taking them for granted. We stop listening to them and guess what? If we stop
listening to them, they’re going to find other people that will listen to them
much better. It’s just the way it is, so if we sincerely value our relationship with our spouse, we
have to work on continually growing together by learning how to
listen to them as we grow together and in a spousal relationship, we are so busy
with our lives you know I know that sometimes I’m at wit’s end because there’s just not
enough hours in a day to get things done and there’s like a whole litany of things
and sometimes I get frustrated because I almost expect my husband to read my mind and
to know the list and to get it done without my asking and sometimes I have to
like catch myself thinking but I haven’t communicated the things that needs to be
done to him in a way that he understands it so how can I expect him to just read
my mind like this incredible magician he should be that knight in shining
armor taking away all my problems and making my life so easy because he
is so privileged to be my husband. Sometimes I find myself falling into that state
because life is just so busy that I forget to acknowledge that he is my
partner and my most important partner in life and the simple communication of
just letting him I appreciate him like, honey, I love you. You know, you were an ass last night but I still love you and just letting him know that you know we will be rubbing up
against each other, that’s the beauty of life because as I rub up against him and he rubs up
against me, sometimes he’s a little stronger, he’s the viking and he rubs
me a little deeper and harder but that’s what helps me be a better person in the end and I realized the
importance of acknowledging him and yes you exist and yes you know you can’t read
my mind. I know you love me, but just because you cannot read my mind does not mean
you do not love me, and I have to acknowledge that he is trying his best, and when I do that, when I make him feel understood because I give him my undivided attention even
though things are you know going crazy. When he is talking to me, I give him
my eyeballs you know not just my ears, and I give him my body direction, then he feels
understook, and when I tell him these simple things like honey, last night was last night
but I love you, you know and you are the most important thing, I acknowledge him.
Suddenly this whole hallelujah comes over my husband and he is just inspired to do incredible things for me without my asking and that’s the beauty of love and I think sometimes in a religious community, we forget to really appreciate
our spouses, the unspoken things that our spouses do for us each day and really on behalf of the family and
you know I know that there are things that my husband does around the house on a daily
basis that he doesn’t really expect brownie points on, but I notice. I notice
it all you know but just noticing it and feeling smug inside, I realized is
quite selfish of me. I mean, if my husband makes me feel warm and fuzzy
inside because of the little things that he does that he really doesn’t expect to
be appreciated for but I take that opportunity because he means the world
to me and express my appreciation for him by just going up to him and just giving
him that hug from behind or just letting him know that I can’t do without his muscles or muscles,
you know there are things that he does around the house that makes my life and
my family’s life more beautiful and more worthwile and I realized that you know I’m kind of like a very introverted
person and that I like to keep all thoughts to myself, and you know in a married
relationship you have to express it and when I express it to my husband, when I show him my
appreciation, that appreciation comes back in folds, multi folds and you realize, wow, so this is how you show somebody that you really truly care for them and even in my own relationship with my parents you know the most difficult thing about
being in the True Family is that you don’t feel understood. You don’t feel
acknowledged. You don’t feel appreciated by your parents, you know your parents
are really there for the larger world and they’re not there to be there as your
biological paretns really meeting your every need and helping you to grow it’s almost like you’re
born into this family and you’re expected to grow and you’re are expected to feel
understood acknowledged appreciated all on your own and you can’t really do that on
your own. You need the participation of your parents and that’s really the heartistic
difficulty of every True Child because our parents belong to the world and they are so busy
taking care of everybody that there’s really hasn’t been that kind of an
opportunity to really have them interact with us as father and mother and that’s
why there is this incredible han you know my husband and I, having gone through what
we have gone through for the last three years of really being the reject you
know of the garbage, seen as the garbage of our movement it’s an incredibly painful place to be
but what I remind myself and what my husband does is that regardless of how
difficult the relationship might be, I never gave up on my ideal relationship with my
parents you know even if it’s nonexistent or even if it’s bit absentee
parentism, even if you know I am not being understood, acknowledged, or
appreciated, I’ve never given that one day, I will experience these things and
you know it may never happen in this lifetime but that’s ok, you know we have eternal life and that’s
a beautiful thing about being a family is that I know that sooner or later, I will experience this with my family and the
thing that really kind of you know helps Ben and I grow together is that we have an
understanding of the kind of a couple we want to be. We have a picture of what we
want to be, so regardless of what we go through in life, we remind ourselves the
important three steps of making each other feel understood, acknowledged, and
appreciated and reminding ourselves of this incredible
picture of a beautiful couple and a beautiful family that we would like to create and that’s what helps us keep us going. So, you know the good old Buddha said long time ago that there’s a really
really two mistakes that you can make in the road to in a life a fifth or in
the road to truth. He says the only two mistakes that you can make is not going
all the way or not getting started. Well, lucky for us, thanks to True
Parents and thanks to heavenly parents, we have not had a problem with getting
started whether we wanted to or not we have already started but the second thing
that we need to concentrate on is really not giving up and going all the way and
really kind of having that understanding that even if things are not ideal, it’s a process. It’s a journey. Learn to
appreciate it, learn to grow together with it, learn to grow resilience while rubbing
up against each other because it’s that resilience, it’s that tension, it’s the
being in a difficult situation that produces the greatest strength and I
think a lot of people don’t realize that a good marriage is really a work of trying
to build that resilience and learning to work with the tensions to help us become stronger human beings and it’s like that in a marriage, it’s like that in a family with father
and mother and brothers and sisters and it’s like that in any intimate
relationships. So don’t give up brothers and sisters. Keep on going and I
want to make one point clear in our our conversation about the importance of
understanding and acknowledging and appreciating the other, it does not mean
that we need to understand and acknowledge and appreciate in every kind
of a setting, what I mean by that is if the relationship is abusive, if the
relationship detrimental in that the other person is being hurt or
physically abused or mentally or emotionally abused then that is really
not a relationship that is worthy of continuing and that is something that we
need to be honest about. There are situations when the other needs to pull
away, when we need to pull up really for the sake of the other person. Sometimes
being in an abusive relationship does not make the other person better, in fact,
sometimes it makes it worse. So understanding that I am not talking
about extreme difficulty of relationships but in most family relationships
or most conjugal relationship where there is a basic understanding of human
rights and a basic understanding and the need to honor and respect each other,
then the importance of really helping the other person feel understood,
acknowledged, and appreciated becomes incredibly important. So brothers and
sisters, with that in mind, you know let’s start our day remembering our heavenly parent, loving our True Parents and really being grateful for the life that
we have been given to live each day with our True Parents here and I want to really thank everybody once
again for your beautiful heartistic testimonies that you sent to me and keep
it coming because it’s just a wonderful testament of how we are growing together
through the magic and the blessing of the internet. So once again ,thank you
have a great week. If you have any questions or comments please leave them
below the video go to InJinMoon.com and use the contact form and don’t
forget to subscribe to our email list and for those of you who want to contribute to
our work here at i-Home Church, just click on the donate button, thank you, bye bye.

3 comments

  1. " It's   from  a  little  step  that   a long   jorney  starts  "   chinese  saying  .
    ChukSaJangNim   once  again……………  Komapsumnida

  2. In 2016 I Wish more wisdom for you concerning providency, success and cosmic realization for Koreans , Japanese and around world!

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